Jessica Bailey
NWS (Matt)- Tell us about your modeling experience. Have you ever done anything politically related before.
Jessica Bailey- I’ve done plenty of modeling, but nothing politically related.
NWS- Do you stay politically active? Are there any causes or issues that pickle your fancy? If so, what and why and what is your position?
JB- Abortion. I think men need to mind their own business concerning this.
NWS- What is the sexiest thing you’ve ever done?
JB- I’m an extremely sexy dancer. This shoot was quite sexy too. Made me feel sexy, anyway.
NWS- I’d say so. So, I dont mind saying that you are blessed with a lot of backside… I really have no question. Just wanted to give it praise. Praise be the backside of Jessica Baily
JB- You’re funny. You’ve got a nice backside too.
NWS- Thanks. My wife says it’s my best asset. I believe it’s my mind. I hate being objectified. Shooting you was fun. You were playful, knew how to hold yourself, and not bashful. I told you that we dont do nudity because we are a liberal site and some of the feminists get annoyed. You told me that feminists should be proud of their bodies. Please expand on that.
JB- The body is beautiful. It’s an asset for women. Women should be proud of it and use it.
NWS- Do you travel much? If so, where, if not, where do you want to go?
JB- No, can’t afford it. But I’m still young. I really want to go to Peru, but after hearing about your escapade, maybe not.
NWS- Describe your ideal man.
JB- Lame question. I have no idea. One who isn’t an a-hole.
NWS- You have $100 dollars to burn. You A-get a massage. B- get drunk. C- Give it to a charity. D- go out for a crazy good dinner. E- take it to a strip club and get a lap dance?
JB- Honestly? I probably get drunk, and if there’s enough left-over, I’d get a lap dance. I’d like to say charity, but I’d be lying.
NWS- If you were President for day, what is the first piece of legislation that you would introduce?
JB- Let the gays marry.
NWS- Are you for Universal Health Care, or do you think the current insurance system works?
JB- I don’t have insurance. So yeah, give it to us.
NWS- A lot of our readers are meat-headed, beer drinking, douche-bags. They dont talk to women because they dont get them, can’t relate. They grun t at them when they’re horny, or when they need another beer. What would you like to tell this faction of the population about women in general?
JB- We are more than tits and ass. We also have legs. Just kidding. No, treat us like you’d want us to treat you. We’re people, don’t be afraid of us, and don’t treat us like second class citizens.
NWS- Our last model says she does not beleive in love. That it is something that is only for cheesy people. What is your take on love?
JB- I’d say your last model is probably a sad person. Of course I believe in love. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t bother continuing on with life.
NWS- Would it be crass if I said I was in love with your behind?
JB- I think you already said it, but yes, it would be crass, but go ahead anyway. Girls love compliments from cute boys.
NWS- Note to audience… she called me cute, and a boy. I’m 36, that feels good. Thank you. Anyway, It’s t-shirt day in America. What does the slogan on your shirt read?
JB- you break it, you buy it.
NWS- I’m not sure what that means, but ok. Who is the greatest American ever and why?
JB- hopefully, he hasn’t been born yet. We need a real leader to fix this mess.
NWS- Again, it was a pleasure shooting you. Thanks for being a part of naked word surfer.
JB- thank you. I hope people like the pictures.
Taylor
Naked Word’s Matt- Taylor, we should probably start with the most interesting thing about you. Tell us about this movie that you’re making
Taylor- yea, I’m doing a feature film – first feature I’ve ever done. I don’t quite know what to say about it…
NW- where did you get that idea from?
Taylor- I got the idea when I was 17 – in 11th grade. I actually don’t remember how I got it – I just remember thinking that is was the most brilliant idea ever… I still do think that…
NW- when will it be finished.
Taylor – we’re supposed to be filming in February… so it may be finished for the most part by June… it has to be finished entirely by September, though, definitely…
NW- who are you cinematic role models
I don’t know – I don’t really have any… people say that I have “Tim Burton hair”… that’s totally bull-shit… Tim Burton spends at least 5 hours on his hair everyday…
NW- now, on to sex…. you’re sexy. Very. You’ve got a fit, depressed, sexy-goth thing going for you. Is this how you see yourself? If not, how do you see yourself?
Taylor- huh… I wouldn’t ever think of myself as having a “goth” thing going on, let alone a “sexy-goth” thing… I get “hippie” a lot… although I hate hippies; I guess I could see how people would think that… I’ll go with it…
Wait, aren’t “fit” and “goth” kind of a contradiction anyway?
NW- it’s inevitable that our readers will ask, so I’m just going to save the hassle and ask, you gotta a boyfriend?
No. I don’t do boyfriends. The idea makes me want to puke. I don’t like the idea of “relationships”. I have a best friend that’s a male… and no, it’s not a “friends with benefits” thing… everyone thinks he’s my boyfriend… but I don’t do boyfriends… and that’s that…
NW- what’s the most fun you’ve ever had?
I’m really not into fun… probably Halloween night or Christmas morning when I was 6 or 7 or 8… That was pretty fun…
NW- what’s the most intense thing you’ve ever done?
Uh. I popped my saliva gland snowboarding when I was like, 13… Does that count? I also flunked out of elementary school…
NW- when has Taylor been bad?
Now that’s just silly…
NW- what kind of guys do you usually like?
Appearance
Ones that look like Jesus. Which is essentially the “rockstar” look. If they don’t have long hair, forget it. I’m very specific, actually… they have to be between 5′9-5′11, long hair (brown is preferable), slim, but toned (abs are a must, just because if you don’t have them, it means that you’re fat and lame…), scruff is a plus, but beard is a no, body hair is retarded, and I hate big fat chests – sick!, brown or green eyes are preferable, and they must have a nice face too (I mean, duh)… mocha guys are nice too…
Personality
Just don’t be a square. Don’t be a “gentleman” either. I prefer an “asshole” over a “gentleman.” if they have long hair, but question cutting it, they just don’t get it, so never even mind. If they’re into partying or drinking or weed-ing or taco bell – sick. Hopefully they’ll have some project or interest that they’re working on. ~age 30 is preferable – I rarely get along with dudes my age. I could really go on…
NW- we are a socio-political website. Are there any relevant and current issues that really get you going? If so, please, run a rant at us. Show us your passion.
You know, I wish there were. I’m kind of out of the loopola when it comes to relevant and current issues… heh… I don’t understand why the idea of abortion is even questioned – people flush goldfish down the toilet all the time, and no one gives a shit… abort! abort! abort!
NW- what else, in life in general, makes you passionate.
I mean, I have a whole list of things I hate:
-infants – they are fat, lazy, and total morons…
-recovered drug addicts who won’t shut up – seriously, you couldn’t have just od’d? Jesus…
-fat women walking around whole foods with yoga mats – …
-parties – lame
-”fun” – lame
-edgar allen Poe – like, really lame…
-bodybuilders – get over your retard complex, and stop wasting the world’s resources… it’s been done… your biceps will never make up for your 2-inch dick, so get over it, and stop making your selves even more unattractive than you already are… I mean, shit…
I could really go on…
NW- we are of the belief that life is only worth living if you’ve experience love, and if everything you do is in the pursuit of happiness. how have you pursued happiness?
Love is something that can only be experienced, by very, very cheesy people.
-Taylor T. (this is true, by the way…)
NW- I do, however, for the record, completely disagree with your notion on love… if you don’t believe in love, what’s the friggen point? you’ve got to have something to live for, right? I’m not religious, so there goes that- so, there’s love. love doesn’t just mean love of someone else, but love of my earth and my fellow man. anyway, to each their own, but I am curious, if you don’t believe in love, what do you wake up for each day? why bother? is there something that makes living worth it to you?
Well now you’re going into the whole philosophical thing, which completely begs for the “definition” of “love”… ugh… I was referring to the seemingly most common definition/perception of the word……also brining us into the whole difference between “love” and “like” and blah blah blah, and I’m already getting a migraine… gaaahhh…wait; was that a “follow up question”? O_O
NW- again, Taylor, I loved shooting you. You were a lot of fun. Now it’s your turn to tell us how much you love naked word, and especially the photographer/editor, me.
I actually did like you. You pretty much fit all of the requirements outlined above. Yea, you were acceptable… 
Meredith Blanche
Naked Word’s Matt- Hi, Meredith, thanks so much for participating.
Meredith Blanche- it’s my pleasure.
NWS- your modeling resume is a mile long- you’re the first hottie we’ve had who makes her living this way. Why did you want to be a model?
MB- I guess the honest answer would be that I like attention.
NWS- We are all about honesty at the Naked Word. What has been your favorite job?
MB- I did a Diesel campaign that was a lot of fun, but this shoot may topple that at the top of the charts.
NWS- A woman after my heart.
MB- sure. whatever floats your boat.
NWS- you’ve also told us that you’re very politically active. Tell me about some of the groups you volunteer for.
MB- I could go on about this all day. But I wont. Because it’s boring. I volunteer MoveOn.org to get my political fix and I volunteer for Habitat for Humanity to get my fix of helping out.
NWS- two good organizations. Good for you… I would love to watch you build a house- some carpenter pants, a little tight tank top, all hot and sweaty
MB- I’m gonna have to stop you there.
NWS- sorry, I get carried away sometimes. So, you’re President tomorrow. You get to change one law. What do you do?
MB- I could say something like make gay marriage legal, and though that’s important, if I had just one law, I’d want to do something that saved lives. I dunno. I don’t want to answer hastily. That’s a big responsibility. I’d really have to think about it.
NWS- Fair enough. Who was your idol growing up?
MB- Madonna. She’s gotten a little whacky, but back in the day, there was no woman out there, besides her, doing the kind of things she was. She was strong and independant and sexual, and I loved that. It gave girls like me the hopes of being strong too.
NWS- Yeah, she really did change the game. So, once father time ends your modeling career, what do you intend to do?
MB- That’s something that I’ve never been asked before in an interview, but something that I think about often. I mean, I’ve got to be realistic. I can probably do this until I’m thirty and that’s about it. I want to do something for humanity, but at the same time, I’ve got to be able to make a living. I’d love to get some kind of paid job for a non-profit like Unicef or something.
NWS- That would be great. Or, maybe once NWS really takes off, you could be our spokesperson and travel the world and represent us
MB- sign me up.
NWS- done deal. Well, it was fun. Thanks for participating.
MB- thanks for having me
Holly Silva
Naked Word’s Matt- Thanks for coming to the shoot; I hope you enjoyed it. Have you ever done anything like this before?
Holly Silva- No, this is my first time. …I’m a little nervous.
NWS- As you know, we are a socio-political website. We like for all of our models to take up some kind of position. What political platform most interests you?
HS- The word, “political” is a complete turn-off for me. Over centuries, it has become synonymous with words, “jungle”, “smoke-filled room” and “zoo”. (See www.thesaurus.com) A modern civilized society such as ours cannot survive without an organized form of government, so though I am in great support of government I strongly oppose the direction that the democratically elected leaders have taken ours.
NWS- If you were President, what kind of change would you initiate?
HS- Public tarring and feathering and amputation of appendages would be my first bills just after mandated I.Q. testing for all government officials, including those in the justice system. People would definitely think twice before committing immoral, inhumane and/or vicious acts (Did you hear that, Mr. Madoff?). Also, less enabling and more rehabilitating for the disabled, homeless, and underprivileged. Next, separation between private corporations and federal government. Have you seen “Food Inc.”? Way too much conflict of interest. Our food should contain less obesity/cancer/heart disease/diabetes/autism causing agents, and genetically altered hormones and fillers. After that, the Silva Administration may need to amend and more aggressively enforce the Hippocratic Oath to make it more difficult for medical professionals to just throw drugs at symptoms rather than use their years of training and genuinely focus on individual issues at hand. Oh, and I’d create world peace by prohibiting use of fossil fuel and convert to a society fully reliant on solar power and other sources of recyclable/renewable energy. 
NWS- Jeez, why don’t you really tell us how you feel. I like your pesto! Are you for the new healthcare bill that is currently being discussed?
HS- Ha! Probably needless to say by this point, but for those of you just tuning in: Not in the least.
NWS- me neither. We need a government option… but maybe you don’t agree with that… but it doesn’t matter, it’s my website. Holly, you’re a really cute and sprite little thing. You look like you may have been an athlete at some point in your life. Were you?
HS- I played t-ball with the boys until we grew to the age of jock-strap checks then I moved onto basketball, volleyball, cheerleading and more volleyball.
NWS- I knew it. I know a tight little athletic body when I see one. So, it’s Saturday afternoon, what is Holly most likely to be doing?
HS- If it’s sunny, I’m soaking-up some Vitamin D around the neighborhood or walking to a movie. No sun in sight: eating chips and salsa and streaming Netflix.
NWS- describe your kind of guy… and if he happens to resemble me, well, so be it.
HS- He’d be funny, intelligent, secure, confident, creative, easy-going, self-motivated, healthy, loyal and honest… Chances are, if he’s healthy his image will reflect it. How do I know if he’s honest? It’s in his eyes.
NWS- I’m here to tell you that a man with all those qualities does not exist. You’ll have to settle for someone who’s good looking and can form a full sentence. Speaking of good looking, photographer Joel Silva is fairly ugly, wouldn’t you say?
HS- Joel’s hot too. And if we got married I wouldn’t have to change my last name.
NWS- Good looking too? That would mean that you think I’m good looking. I didn’t ask you that. But I’m very flattered. Since you complimented me, I shall compliment you─you have gorgeous hair- our women readers will want to know your secret. share.
HS- Aww, thanks Naked dude. It’s never been touched by a dye/bleach/etc. Mostly because I’m too lazy and cheap to keep up with the maintenance. First thing in the shower, I wash it and condition with Paul Mitchell’s Super Skinny conditioner, which isn’t rinsed until the very end of my mini-vacation. And I stand behind my ceramic irons and Redken Extreme Iron Repair thermal activated leave-in crème. Say that 5 times fast.
NWS- Ahem… sorry, I fell asleep. What were you saying? Never mind. Anyway, like I said before, you’re a tiny little thing. Ever been in a fight? D’ya win?
HS- Never. I stun the competition with mind games. They never see it coming.
NWS- ha! I love it! What do you most like about yourself?
HS- My tenacity and strong sense of self.
NWS- What do guys most like about you?
HS- Guys like to travel light and I don’t bring much baggage.
NWS- If you had a million dollars to spend on yourself, what would you buy yourself for Christmas?
HS- A teleporter and The Magic Bullet in case I get hungry.
NWS- Cool. I want a teleporter too! Where are you from originally?
HS- A ranch on the outskirts of Tracy, California. My grandpa was born in the house next door.
NWS- Does your family know you did this shoot? and if not, what would they say?
HS- Pshh, they were the first ones I called after I found out I was chosen!
NWS- What is your ethnic background?
HS- Portu-gese, Italiana, Mejicana, Espanola, Papago and Apache Indian, Irish, Asian.
NWS- Translation- mut. Do you have a favorite book or movie? And if so, why?
HS- May sound unsophisticated, but George Weinberg, Ph.D.’s Why Men Won’t Commit: Getting What You Both Want Without Playing Games is the most key influential book I’ve ever read. Why? It’s based on real experiences and makes plenty sense, unlike its more popular “book-turned movie” counterpart. And when it all comes down, It’s easier to conquer your most challenging life goals when you don’t have to worry about the incessant search for a decent relationship and energy-numbing b.s. that comes with games. A must-read for chicks.
NWS- You’re right, that did sound unsophisticated… I’m kidding, but seriously, self-help books suck. Each week, we get hundreds of requests to share our models phone numbers. Of course, we don’t, but I’m sure our readers will want to know if you have a boyfriend?
HS- Yes, two years in the making
NWS- At least 10% of the reason I decided to incorporate Naked’s Hotties into naked word surfer was because I’m a married man who’s not allowed to be with other women, and this at least gives me a legit excuse to stare at some cuties for a few hours every week. in other words, marriage and commitment can be tough. Do you see marriage in your future? kids?
HS- Marriage, I say why the hell not. Kids? I can’t get myself to own a dog past the thought of sitters, poop bags and unexpected visits to the vet. I think I’ll leave child-rearing to the sibs. At least for the next few chapters.
NWS- What are you goals in life?
HS- To leave a damn good humanitarian dent in the history of mankind or at least die trying. Even if my name isn’t mentioned.
NWS- If you are to win Naked’s Hottie of the year, how psyched would you be?
HS- How can I convince you visually…? hmm… This much (note- spreading arms wide apart.)
NWS- Thank you for your time, Holly. We love you!
Breanne Silvi – Miss New Hampshire 2008
NWS editor in chief- Matt- Hi Breanne.
Breanne Silvi- Hi.
NWS- You were chosen to be one of Naked’s hotties partly because of your Miss New Hampshire title. Tell us a little about that experience. High points and low points.
Breanne- Running for Miss NH USA was never something I gave much thought to. The idea came from my Aunt. I had graduated college, moved back to NH and started feeling complacent. She suggested that I run for Miss NH, given that it involved a lot of the things I’m passionate about. Winning truly did come as a surprise. Going to the Miss USA pageant in Vegas was a surreal experience. I roomed with Miss Alaska for the 3 weeks we were there and now I’m living with her in LA. So not only did I have a wonderful time, but I walked away with a great friend. I really can’t say that there were any low points throughout the entire experience. I met 50 other women that inspire and motivate me to be a better person. The only part I wasn’t a huge fan of was keeping myself to a strict nutrition/workout plan.
NWS- What would you advise new girls who are interested in pagentry?
Breanne- I would say to make sure not to lose yourself along the way. People can get caught up in only the physical aspect. Go into it knowing that there will only be ONE winner, so make friends along the way.\
NWS- during the shoot, you got more excited about Joel and I having babies than anything else. You seem like a good old fashioned family gal. Is that accurate?
Breanne- Absolutely! I was raised as an only child, then when I was 18 my parents took custody of a baby boy named Nathan. I helped raise him since he was 4 months old and now he’s 8. Children have always been a huge part of my life and I really value the concept of family.
NWS- Do you want kids?
I definitely want kids someday. I am really big on adoption, especially within this country because there are so many children here who need a home; something I have seen first hand. I of course would love biological children as well…I think most of us wonder what a little spawn of ourselves would look like!
NWS- Whom did you vote for president?
Breanne- This was a difficult decision for me because I respected certain views from both parties and also disagreed with some as well. In the end I made a game-time decision…not gonna say who though, sorry!
NWS- What is the sexiest thing about you?
Breanne- I like sports. I like drinking beer. I like make-up and dressing up. I feel that I am a good blend of girly girl and tom boy.
NWS- Are you taken?
Breanne- That’s a good question…it’s complicated.
NWS- Standard question, and tread carefully because I’m the one writing up this interview… Whom is the sexier man- Joel (the photographer), or myself (the true talent of the site)?
Breanne- The both of you are sexy, sexy men. The artistic creativity that Joel exudes is hot and your raw brain power is a turn on.
NWS- answer accepted. Joel will appreciate you patronizing him. Now, If you could change one thing about humanity, what would it be?
Breanne- more tolerance and respect for one another.
NWS- What is the sexiest thing you’ve ever done?
Breanne- After winning the Miss New Hampshire contest, I yelled to my friend in the audience, “What’s the score of the Pats game??”
NWS- What one thing does New Hampshire not know about you that they probably shouldnt? and dont worry, of our 100,000 weekly readers, zero come from new hampshire.
Breanne- I probably wouldn’t want them to know that after moving to California; I don’t miss NH at all!!!
NWS- When looking for a boyfriend or mate, what qualities do you look for, physically and personality wise?
Breanne- I have always been a sucker for bright blue eyes and someone over 6 feet, but none of that matters if the guy can’t make me laugh or if he takes himself too seriously!
NWS- I’m six feet when I stand on my tippy toes. What is the first thing guys tend to notice about you?
Breanne- I would like to think something like my eyes, or my smile…
NWS- Sorry. It’s your leggy legs. Lovely leggy legs… But you’ve got a great smile too. If we made a baby, it would be a real cutie. Your legs and my… I dont know… but I’ve got one, and he’s a cutie, so I must have some good stock. Anyway, if you badly want a baby, and dont find that special man, I just want you to know that Im here for you. Did you come from a big family?
Breanne- Haha thanks for the offer, I’ll certainly keep it in mind. I do come from a large Irish/Italian family….lots of cousins!
NWS- What did you dress as for halloween this year? Most girls do the slutty nurse or slutty cheerleader, or slutty something. I have a feeling you did something else?
Breanne- I spent this Halloween at a dear friend’s wedding…but had I been able to dress up it would’ve probably been something more old Hollywood than trashy. Sexy and sophisticated is my motto.
NWS- Por not?
Breanne- To each their own. It’s natural, has medicinal purposes….there are certainly worse things to have as a vice. I would however, not condone anything that causes addiction.
NWS- Whom do you idolize in life and why?
Breanne- Running the risk of sounding cliché, my mother. She has devoted her life to helping others and is never selfish.
NWS- Sexiest five men alive?
Breanne- Paul Walker, Brad Pitt, Marlin Brando (young Brando), Gerard Buttler, and P.R. (not gonna tell you who that stands for)
NWS- I’m disappointed in that answer. Paul Walker is a tool, and so is P.R. Joel will be offended that he didn’t beat out P.R. How about women?
Breanne- Halle Berry, Adriana Lima, Charlize Theron, Shakira, Jessica Alba
NWS- That is a much more respectable list. NWS approves. Now, tell us why you wanted to be one of Naked’s hotties, and what you hope to accomplish from this. Are you looking to begin an acting or modeling career, or did the politics of the site draw you, or the parenting aspects?
Breanne- I like what the site represents….smarts, style, conviction. I am pursuing an acting career and hoping some modeling will pay the bills along the way.
NWS- Was working with naked a good experience for you?
Breanne- Working with Naked was a great experience. I met great people, had a wonderful shoot and felt that I was able to completely express myself.
NWS- What is the bigger title- Miss New Hampshire or Naked’s hottie? Feel free to lie. We have fragile egos
Breanne- Someone gets to be Miss New Hampshire every year….there are only a few original hotties!
NWS- That a girl! Can you leave us with some words of wisdom?
Breanne- Its not about the destination, it’s the journey. Life is way too short to take yourself too seriously….laugh everyday!
Hallah Karman
Hallah came into the photo shoot sporting some attitude, a big smile, and a lovely curvy body. She was a gracious subject, willing to do whatever we asked her, in the name of art. We had a lot of fun shooting Hallah. She’s an artist with some interesting points of view, as well as a good sense of humor. Hallah is also a photographer, and photographers can be difficult to shoot, as they always want to throw their two cents into the production, but Hallah let the rookies do our thing. Enjoy Hallah’s sexy shoot with Naked, and check out her interview, which was the most fun of all of them.
NWS (Matthew) – Thank you for getting Naked for Naked. I had a really good time at the photo shoot. You?
Hallah Karaman – I had an excellent time on the shoot. Joel Silva is an excellent photographer, and getting to know those GORGEOUS women you’ve selected to represent your kickass website was awesome. How many girls get to wake up and say “I was photographed on a beautiful Harley yesterday?” Very cool experience.
NWS – During the shoot, we learned that you are quite the skilled artist. Art is the sexiest thing in the world… besides boobs… and you have those too. Tell us about your art. Where can we find some of your work?
HK – Oh, goodness! I always get a little shy and giggly when I talk about my work. I guess my passion for creating things began at age 12, when I started messing with film photography. I was totally the geeked-out art nerd in high school, always taking pictures & making endless scrapbooks. I decided that was all I ever wanted to do. You can check out my photography & various artwork at my website, www.newhalophotography.com.
NWS – I’ve purchased one of your painted rock albums. I chose the cover of the greatest album of all time (Pearl Jam’s “ten”). It looks fantastic in my son’s nursery. Where did you get this clever little idea from?
HK – First, let me say that I was so happy when you asked me to do that piece, because one of the things that has always moved me is the love between a parent & new child. I took the order to a new level with a technique I’ve never tried before, and I was really pleased with the results. I am sooo glad that you love it too! I’ve painted on huge paned windows, doors, cabinets, skateboard decks, etc. One day I was staring at my record collection, and I figured, “Why not?” I like the idea of creating a musical painting that you can actually play.
NWS – One reason we chose you was the self portrait that you submitted to us. We tried to replicate it in the shoot. What kind of photography do you most enjoy doing?
HK – Oh man, that’s such a tough question! I find that I take a lot of pleasure in shooting things of intense beauty, regardless of their form. A few weeks ago I photographed a stunning friend of mine, Sarah Hunt, and have some great shots of her eyes, which are a gorgeous deep shade of blue. I LOVE shooting live shows, raves, parties, any place where people are going crazy!
NWS – Since you let us photograph you naked, I’m going to have to offer to repay the favor. So, when do you want to shoot me?
HK- (laughing) Matt, I am the ONE girl here you should not tempt with that question! Before you know it, I’ll have you standing bare assed on a rock, sprayed head to toe in neon body paint, while midgets dressed as Green Man run around you, lighting the grass on fire. Welcome to the mind of an artist…
NWS – Awesome! I love showing my bare ass! Have you not seen the Naked homepage? I’m proud to say that is my ass. And can’t get enough of midgets. Have I told you about my midget fantasy?
HK – No.
NWS – Want to hear it?
HK – Moving on.
NWS – Moving on. Standard question. For whom did you vote for president?
HK – When the same sex marriage issue began last year during election time, I felt like it was worth my time to put my one mark in. Because of this, I voted for our current President. I did not vote for Barack for his position on gay marriage; I simply DID NOT vote for John McCain because his stance on the issue was so clear cut, and it disgusted me. I wanted to see a change.
NWS – If you were president for a week, and had cart blanche, what would you change?
HK – Easy question. I would legalize marijuana. Yes, I am an avid pot smoker, and I enjoy it for selfish and purely recreational purposes, but this does not change the fact that, if done properly, it could have a very positive impact on our economy, via taxes. Pot and hemp can be used to create fuel, paper and clothing. Legalizing it would eliminate some of the people we have selling to kids on the street, as well as these bogus “doctors” who are out there pretending to be qualified to make medical decisions.
NWS – I like pot too. Pot and midgets. We have two things in common. So, when you shoot me, can we have the midgets stoned?
HK – Absolutely.
NWS – Another standard question. Joel, the photographer, or me?
HK – Unlike the other models, I’m actually going to answer this instead of just flirtatiously laughing and beating around the question to avoid hurting either of your feelings. I would choose you Matt, and this is why. While Joel is a very attractive man, we share the same profession, and he is QUITE a bit taller than me, whereas you, Matt, are pretty short. You possess one of my favorite qualities in a guy. HUMOR. I’ve been keeping up with your blogs on the site, and your witty and intelligent mind just speaks to me. Plus, you likes Pearl Jam!
NWS – So you’re calling me short and ugly?
HK – Short. Not ugly.
NWS – But you said Joel is very attractive, and I’m short and funny. Nothing about being attractive. I’m hurting inside.
HK – Stop being a baby.
NWS – What do you aspire to achieve in the next ten years?
HK – My dreams are random and unorganized to the point that they actually cause people pain. I want to have a monstrous exhibit that involves every special person in my life to be present. I want to travel to the smaller places no one has ever heard of. I want to visit Africa and teach children how to paint, create, and gain hope. I want to feed the homeless and give them new hopes and dreams. And I want to marry the one person in the world I love, if he’ll have me…
NWS – Do you have a specific person in mind.
HK – Moving on.
NWS – Moving on. There are plenty of ‘boobs’ guys out there in the world. You have one of the most incredible natural sets my innocent eyes have ever seen. Do you find this helps attract the kind of men you want to be with, or attracts the perverts and losers?
HK – (laughs). I always joke that I should have been a bartender or a warden, because I’m so used to dealing with creepy, perverted men that I actually take pleasure in making them feel shameful and embarrassed. I HOPE that what attracts the type of guys I like, as you say, is my heart and kickass personality. But you guys are only human.
NWS – People would look at you, in all your tattooed glory, and conclude, whether
right or wrong, that you are a bit of a punk rock, rebellious chick who probably was sneaking out of her parents house at the age of 16 to party with boys. At Naked, we do our best to avoid all stereotypes based on appearance. So, tell us what kind of gal you are
HK – In answering this, I worry about coming off as conceited but the truth is I’m pretty awesome, and there shouldn’t be any shame in being a confident chick. But I’m no punk rocker. I’m a nerd. I geek out to 90’s rock, I wear men’s loafers, and I cry when I am sad. I know that people look at me and assume that I can take care
of anything, and I am pretty creative, but even tattooed chicks like to cuddle… J
NWS – I’m a total cuddler. If you can’t find someone to do that with you, give me a call.
HK – How would your wife feel about that?
NWS – She’s a cuddler too. Do you like Asian girls?
HK – (laughs)
NWS – With our past Naked hotties we got thousands of requests for their phone numbers. I anticipate getting thousands of requests for yours too. Because I’m greedy, I will not share it. That being said, are you single or taken? What kind of guy do you go for?
HK – Well, although I will not indulge the first half of that question with an answer, I will share this. If you’re conventionally good looking, I probably wouldn’t be attracted to you. I like MEN. Real men. Your car will not impress me, nor will the size of your bank account. What will impress me is the guy with an incredible knowledge of movies & music, as well as the taste that accompanies it. The guy who knows when to be the man in the situation, and when to step back and tread lightly. I like the guy who, not now, but someday, is going to be a kickass Dad. I think the girls will get me on this one, but the men might not. I can’t explain it better than that.
NWS – Other than pot, give me a political subject that really moves you, and tell me your position on it.
HK – Well, my father is Palestinian from the old country. He lives in the US now, but we watch as our land is tragically taken from the Israeli government day by day. When I visited them in April, three acres of our farm was set on fire while we slept. My whole family ran out in their pajamas to try to put out the blaze. It’s painful to watch. I don’t even care at this point if we regain control. I just want the terror to stop. We all just want peace.
NWS – Wow, that’s serious. I’m speechless, which is rare. Let’s hope for peace. War sucks.
HK – Yep.
NWS – If you could change something about yourself, what would you change?
HK- I would want my long hair back. In high school I had gorgeous long hair. I was even voted “Best Hair” in our senior yearbook. One day I just got sick of the work, and I lobbed it all off. It’s been a few years now, and I really want that hair back.
NWS – Well, we love you just the way you are. What one thing about you makes this world a better place?
HK – I think that any artist who creates work that inspires others is helping to make the world better. I am happy to help create and teach others to express themselves and feel good.
NWS – Again, thank you for disrobing for us. It was a real pleasure to shoot you in all your Naked glory. Now, tell all our readers how much you love nakedwordsurfer!
HK – Naked word surfer totally rocks!
Photography by Joel Silva- JoelSilvaPhotography.com
Make-up by Samantha Pena- Myspace.com/smokymirrorsla.com
Model- Hallah Karaman- www.newhalophotography.com (check it out for really great rock paintings)
Interviewer – your kick ass editor, Matthew Nespoli
Stephanie Stunner – Naked’s Hottie
Naked’s Hotties now gives you Stephanie. Stephanie came in with a beautiful unmade face and the kind of curvy body that makes men sin inside our heads. She was a ton of fun on the shoot and had plenty of interesting opinions. Stephanie works for Playboy radio and would ultimately like to host a show. We don’t play favorites at Naked Word Surfer, but Stephanie would be near the top of the list if we did.
INTERVIEW
NWS – Matt- Hi, Stephanie.
SS – Hi.
NWS – Thanks for coming. You look amazing today.
SS – Thank you.
NWS – And?
SS – And what?
NWS – And how do I look?
SS – (she laughs)
NWS – Moving on. First question. There are a lot of racial stereotypes out there. Some of them are largely true, some not. I’m married to an Asian. She loves karoke and being in front of a camera. Is it safe to assume that all Asian women are this way (note sarcastic tone to my voice)?
SS – I’ve never heard that stereotype before! Ha! Now, I have heard that we are bad drivers, good at math and have high SAT scores. I think I break all stereotypes.
NWS – Where are your family roots?
SS – My family is originally from Jersey.
NWS – I’m sorry to hear that.
SS – Ha ha! Anyway, my mother was adopted, so I have an Irish Grandmother. My ancestry is from China, and I don’t speak a lick of Mandarin, except when it comes to food! YUM.
NWS – When you were a little girl, what did you dream of being when you grew up?
SS – I really love animals, and I always wanted to be a Veterinarian, or a marine biologist. It’s a hard choice…animals of the land, or animals of the sea!
NWS – So, I take it that cover model for Naked Hottie wasn’t a childhood dream?
SS – No, but I like to take things as they come. I see this site going places, and I’m glad I could be a part of it.
NWS – Would your dad be proud of you for this, or embarrassed?
SS – What Dad doesn’t know won’t kill him. If I were wearing more clothing he would probably be more likely to approve.
NWS – Give me a social issue you really care about.
SS – I believe we need to find a way to take care of our homeless, underprivileged children and battered women. These are our most vulnerable citizens, and it’s the responsibility of the strong to care for the weak.
NWS – You told us at the shoot that you work for Playboy radio.
SS – Yes, I did.
NWS – Will you take me to the ranch?
SS – No.
NWS – Fine. Don’t expect an invitation to my next Christmas party then.
SS – It’s not that I wouldn’t take you; it’s that you need to be an attractive woman or a famous man to go.
NWS – Moving on. Working at Playboy, you obviously understand how women are sometimes objectified. At Naked Word, we are a progressive group, but still we love boobies as much as the next group of guys. Is there any halfway ground where women and men can meet on this issue? Where we can appreciate and even lust after the beautiful female form without it having to become some kind of political issue or a slap in the face of the feminine movement?
SS – I think there definitely is a middle ground. If women weren’t so hard on themselves and tried to love their bodies more, we would be able to accentuate our positives and men could really see that all women are different, and so is their beauty. We also need to keep in mind what is realistic and practical. Men, however, need to keep in mind that they should embrace their woman’s body. There is a reason why fantasies are fictional.
NWS – Not to “objectify” you, but you have one of the most beautiful sets of breasts that my old eyes have ever seen. Do you find that this makes men objectify you, or makes it hard to make guy friends?
SS – Moving on.
NWS – Okay. On that topic…Do you believe that man and woman can truly be friends or does one of the two always desire to sleep with the other?
SS – I totally think men and women can be friends. I grew up as a tomboy. I watch sports, I drink beer, and I also like Sports Center! But don’t get me wrong. When I get dolled up I look pretty good. It’s fun to get ready and gorgeous. As long as the relationship doesn’t become too flirtatious or sexual, then there is no problem having real friendships with men.
NWS – On the topic of women, what would you like to see happen for women before your lifetime ends?
SS – I would love to see a woman become President of The United States. As a country, we have faced a lot of issues as well as change, and it is in the near future.
NWS – Hillary maybe?
SS – Maybe.
NWS – Okay, you can pick only one of two: 1. Be the greatest mother of all time. 2. Be the sexiest girl to ever walk the planet. Which do you pick and why?
SS – I would choose to be the greatest mother of all time. If I can make an impact as well as raise an independent and responsible individual, that would mean more to me than having people only like me because of my looks. Now, if I could do both that would make me a MILF! Ha ha!
NWS – Surfing or skiing?
SS - Snowboarding! I would love to learn to surf, but I’ve been boarding for like 12 years now.
NWS – Legalize marijuana?
SS – Only for actual medical purposes, or for people who need it to ease through pain.
NWS – Smoke it?
SS - Never
NWS – Boo. At your first high school reunion, what will your classmates be most surprised about when they see you and talk to you?
SS – Well, in high school, I was into sports. I got along with all the jocks and just everyone in general. I didn’t wear much makeup because I would have much rather spent that extra half hour sleeping in than getting pretty to go to school. Plus, I got all sweaty at practice and makeup would have gotten messy anyways. Nowadays, I run into people I’ve gone to high school with from time to time, and they will often compliment my appearance, which feels good, but sometimes they sound surprised about finding me pretty which makes me think, “Why did I look like shit in high school?” Anyway, I think I’m like wine…better with age. I’d hope that, at my reunion, people would feel the same way. I just hope it won’t be that awkward high school feeling all over again.
NWS – Are you pleased with Obama?
SS – Very. Let’s not forget what Obama was given to work with.
NWS – What do you want to see him accomplish before his term is over?
SS – Affordable healthcare for everyone.
NWS – Our mantra here is “Only sheep need a shepherd.” It’s a bit of a slap on religion and the conservative movement. Jesus was often referred to as a shepherd to the flocks of people. We are stating that everyone should lead themselves, rather than follow. Enough about us. Give me a personal mantra that suits you.
SS – “Fortes Fortuna Adiuvat”
NWS – I have no idea what that means. What is the sexiest thing about you, physically?
SS – I would say my hair. It’s real, soft, smells good, long and versatile.
NWS – Mmm. Nice. Can I touch it?
SS – No.
NWS – May I smell it?
SS – Um, no.
NWS – Okay, then I can neither confirm nor deny, for our readers, that your hair is soft and smells good. Now, my eyes are closed. Now what is the sexiest thing about you?
SS – It would be my hour glass shape. I’m petite, but I have curves in the right places.
NWS – May I…Never mind! Why do guys love you?
SS – I’m into sports, I like beer pong, and I can hold my booze. I’m also the type of person who would make snacks and homemade guacamole for the big game and have chilled beers ready. Also, I’m totally drama free. I’m like one of the guys. Plus, I’d look way hotter in a white tank top than your buddy.
NWS – No woman is one of the guys, but you do look fantastic in a tank top. So, Stephanie, why do you love you?
SS – I love me because I have a very positive outlook on life, and I’m easy going. I can definitely follow plans or go with the flow and be spontaneous. Also, I think I get along with fairly everybody, and if I don’t then something is really wrong with them.
NWS – Standard Naked question. Joel (the photographer) and Matt (me) are the last two men on the planet. Joel has a gimpy leg and a history of diabetes in his family. Whom are you reproducing with?
SS – Ha ha! I plead the 5th. You both are great guys.
NWS – I’ll take it. In the past few years, gay marriage has been at the forefront of the political forum. Where do you stand on it?
SS – I think everyone should be able to love and marry whomever they want to love. I don’t see how this is even an issue anymore in this country. We want to move forward not backwards.
NWS – Yeah, I agree. Most who resist this movement are in the church. And that makes no sense. If you’re gay, and there’s a creator, then the creator created you gay. You can’t just decide to become gay. If you offered me a hundred thousand to sleep with my best pal, I’d go for it; however, without pharmaceuticals, I just couldn’t make it happen physically. The equipment wouldn’t work. Amongst women, I know many completely straight women who have kissed another girl. I don’t know a single straight guy who has done this. Why is this?
SS – Most girls are curious, and that’s why we do it. I am, however, proud to say that I have never kissed another girl. But when it comes down to it I think women like to get a reaction out of men, and the easiest way would be to grab your best friends boob and make out, right?
NWS – Stephanie, we love you. Do you love us? Overall, are you happy to be selected as our Naked Hottie?
SS – Of course, I love you guys! Thanks so much for picking me for Naked Hottie! I had soo much fun working with you guys!
NWS – Okay, thanks again, and call me before Hef’s next party.
Model: Stephanie Stunner – www.myspace.com/xoxolovestephanie
Photography by: Joel Silva
Make up by: Samantha Pena – www.myspace.com/smokymirrorsla.com
—————————————————————————————–
Kallee Brookes – Naked’s Original Hottie!
November 2009: Kallee Brooks
November 2009: Stephanie Stunner
December 2009: Breanne Silva
Kallee came showed for the photo shoot looking like the cutie pie girl next door. Then she got dressed and ready for the shoot and turned into the sexy bad girl whom you hope to get detension with after school. Kallee is beautiful and distracting, but once you move past that, and actually listen to the words coming out of her mouth, you’ll find that she’s quite intelligent and has some poignant things to say. Men, this is the type of girl that you all truly want to take home to Mom and show off. Without further delay, here is the photoshoot and interview with Kallee Brookes- Naked’s Original Hottie.
MySpace – www.myspace/kalleebrookes
Twitter – www.twitter.com/kalleebrookes
Naked Word Surfer’s editor, Matt- Kallee- this is such a pleasure. Thank you for sitting with us. First, let me make you aware that Naked Word Surfer is not your typical website. We march to our own beat, we lead, we are not sheep; thus, we picked a woman, you, whom we thought represented those ideals. For your beauty and brains you are Naked’s “Original Naked Hottie” In keeping with the NWS style, this will not be your standard model interview, we don’t care about your bust size, your turn ons and turn offs, or your perfect date. We want to really get to know Kallee. So, tell me-
Here’s the scenario. You’re the last female left on earth and solely responsible for bringing back humanity. First, is humanity worth saving?
Kallee Brookes- We’ve got some problems in today’s world, and most of them are created by man, but yes, most definitely humanity is defiantly worth saving. Although parts of the world are extremely corrupt, humans are a marvelous species capable of creating the extraordinary.
NWS- As the last female, responsible for saving humanity, whom would be the ideal man that you would chose to procreate with? What ideals would you find important in a man in order to save and evolve our species?
KB- I would procreate with a man who had a great understanding of the universe, cause and effect (aka: karma), and an understanding that there is no separation, that in-fact, we are connected through energy. I’d want a selfless non materialistic man, who is disconnected with his ego. A man who see me as his equal and is ready the teach humanity how to love and be happy. My new world will be a land of peace and my people will not know the meanings of hate, anger, and war.
NWS- Good answer, but you didn’t actually say a specific person.
KB- That’s correct.
NWS- OK, I’ll assume you meant me. That sounded like me.
KB- I didn’t say you.
NWS- But you didn’t not say me.
KB- OK, then I’m saying it. Not you.
NWS- Too late, I already wrote it down. In pen… Moving on.
As the only woman left in the world, when you aren’t making love to make babies, you are lonely; there are no women to relate with. To fill up your time, what one book are you reading, what one movie are you watching, and what one CD are you listening to?
KB- I’m reading The Power of Now Eckhart Tolle. I am watching What the Bleep Do We Know. I am listing to the best of DJ Tiesto
NWS- As the last remaining woman in the world, there are a lot of sexless men who will be in hot pursuit of you. You must disappear with your lover in order to stay safe, and save the human race. What secret little spot in what country are you going to?
KB- I’ve already got that area scoped out. I’m going to a secret little cave in Bora Bora that very few people know about.
NWS- Where exactly is it?
KB- Telling you would sort of ruin the “secrecy” of it, don’t you think?
NWS- Okay, moving on to another topic. You mentioned during our photo shoot (which I enjoyed more than I can put into appropriate words), that you wouldn’t get a swine flu shot. Why?
KB- As all humans, stereotypically women, have the right to do, I have read up and become more informed on this subject and have changed my mind about the flu shoot. I discovered that since the swine flu emerged earlier in the year there has been 5,000 deaths worldwide. That’s nothing compared to the 250,000 to 500,000 lives the regular flu takes, but it’s still something. I got the flu shot and I’m getting the swine flu shot soon. So should you.
NWS-Whom did you vote for in the last election?
KB- Obama
NWS- What would you like to see the president accomplish in the next three years?
KB- Ending the war, restoring the economy, and make great changes to prevent global warming.
NWS- Wow, nothing ambitious about those expectations (note sarcasm in my voice as I say it).
KB- We should have high expectations for our President and our country.
NWS- Well said. If Naked Word Surfer became the hottest thing on the net (which we’ll hoping you do for it), and you get elected President of the world, what is the first piece of legislation are you putting into effect?
KB- The first thing that I would do is allow only use green energy in the world i.e. (solar, windmill, etc.). No more gasoline, no more coal, and no more horrible manmade chemicals used as forms of energy. Oil is evil. It’s the cause of this war, and the greed surrounding it has caused nothing but chaos worldwide.
NWS- Now, the most important question- Do you find Joel (Naked’s photographer), or Matt (the brains behind the operation), more sexy?
KB-OMG, I’m not answering that.
NWS- Again, I’ll take your silence to mean me. I understand. Joel’s a hottie, but he just doesn’t have my charisma, huh? Say nothing if you agree.
Note: Kallee opens mouth as if wanting to say something, but I cut her off.
NWS- It’s Saturday night, your boyfriend is saving starving babies in Africa, your family is all out of town, and your girlfriends are all on dates. What are you doing for fun?
KB- take a bubble bath, polish my nails, clean my room, and cuddle up with a good movie.
NWS- Sounds lonely.
KB- I’m good at entertaining myself.
NWS- What makes you powerful?
KB- I can be very persuasive and I know what to do to get what I want.
NWS- What makes you beautiful?
KB- A person’s exterior can only take you so far and doesn’t last forever. I’m beautiful because I see beauty in other people. Everyone and everything in the world is beautiful to me.
NWS- That sounds generic, I’m not buying it. Nobody finds everything beautiful.
KB- I do.
NWS- What makes men like you?
KB- My confidence and intelligence, and the fact that I’m just a normal easy going girl.
NWS- Besides being stunning, in every conceivable definition of the word, what other talents does Kallee possess?
KB- I have an amazing since of direction, you’ll never be lost with me!
NWS- Not that impressive, or sexy. What else you got?
KB- Hmm. I have taken extensive voice over training and I can do several different voices.
NWS- Do one. (Note- she does. Very cool and perversely sexy). Better. What else?
KB- I’m a wonderful cook, learned it all from my mom. I can wiggle my chin (really weird). I compose creative writings and cut up my clothes for cool fashion in my free time. I would like to consider myself a good dancer too.
NWS- Now were getting somewhere. You know the way to a man’s heart is through his belly… amongst other things. Where would our perverted stalker readers most likely to find you on a Sunday morning?
KB- In bed!
NWS- That answer is not going to make your less likely to get stalked. Now, we get real serious… is there a God?
KB- Yes, there is a god. If ‘God’ is what you want to call it. You can call it God, Goddess, incarnation of ‘Everlasting Father’, Buddha, Alpha and Omega, All Knowing. Every country has a different name and a different religion. It’s all the same; it’s the universe- the infinite energy that that never stops creating life. As long as you believe in something you’ll be just fine. In my book no one’s wrong.
NWS-Now, we get playful… you have one of the top five daire-aires in the history of mankind- for logistical reasons, let’s just call you number 5. Who are the four women above you in the buttocks department?
KB- Beyonce, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez, Shakira
NWS- What inspires you?
KB- I’m not satisfied with my current situation, I want so much more from life and that inspires me.
NWS- What angers you?
KB- Close minded arrogant people
NWS- What causes you pain?
KB- Sometime I wish I had a nice female friend. I don’t have any friends really.
NWS- that’s one of the saddest things I’ve ever heard. Breaks my heart. What breaks yours?
KB- When I’m driving down the street and I see I homeless man and then I look to my left and I see a starving dog. The dog breaks my heart. I’m like ‘ I gotta get that dog some food!’
NWS- You get to be the first woman to ever set foot on another planet inhabited by alien life, or you get to be the first woman to learn how to physically defy gravity and fly. Which do you choose and why?
KB- I would choose to fly and defy gravity. And then I’ll fly to space and still be the first woman to set foot on an alien inhabited plant. (;
NWS- Pot or not?
KB- Pot, yes of course. I think pot makes the world a better place. Even though I can’t smoke it I do enjoy the occasional bud brownie
NWS- Sex on top of a mountain, in the fresh air, or in your apartment, in your car, or on the beach?
KB- Sex on top of a mountain, I love being naked and feeling free. I’ve done it once ill do it again. Beach sex is overrated. Sand in the crotch always ruins that party.
NWS- I concur. Naked or panties or pajamas?
KB- Naked, always. Even when it’s cold out.
NWS- Me too. It’s sounding more and more, with every answer that we were made with each other.
KB- Need I remind you that you are married with child.
NWS- I’m just saying. Okay, last question- How proud are you to be the Original Hottie of Naked Word Surfer?
KB- It feels so good. I’ve never won or been first at anything until now. I feel really special. And it lets me know that I am on the right track in my career. Thank you Naked Word Surfer.
Photography by Joel Silva… sexiest straight male photographer and hair designer in the entire world website www.JoelSilvaphotography.com
Make up- Samantha Pena. Great talent. www.myspace.com/smokymirrorsla.com
Casting and interview – yours truly
Model – Kallee Brookes.
Website: www.modelmayhem/KalleeBrookes.
